Chris Nilan felt sick to his stomach Thursday when he learned his former Canadiens teammate Claude Lemieux died by suicide at age 60.
Three nights earlier, Nilan spent time in the Canadiens’ alumni lounge at the Bell Centre with Lemieux and two of his former teammate’s sons, Christopher and Michael, before Lemieux carried the torch into the Bell Centre ahead of Game 3 of the Eastern Conference final between the Canadiens and Carolina Hurricanes.
Nilan and Lemieux won the Stanley Cup together with the Canadiens in 1986.
“I was shocked,” Nilan said Friday morning. “Really, emotionally just so gutted. It’s hard to understand … you just never know what someone’s going through, right? I sat with him in the alumni room, I talked to both his sons and him. We had a great talk, we were laughing, talking about ’86. I was telling his sons about what an impact their father had on that series and me getting to win the Stanley Cup ring I had on my finger. Ten goals (in the playoffs) as a rookie, five game-winners, two in overtime. The kids were happy and he looked great, he sounded great.”
Nilan carried the torch into the Bell Centre ahead of Game 6 of the Canadiens’ first-round playoff series against the Tampa Bay Lightning.
“He asked me what it was like carrying the torch,” Nilan said about his conversation with Lemieux. “I said it’s unbelievable just to be asked. For me, I was shocked and I was honoured. I told him: ‘It’s so electric and emotional. You’ll see people are going to go nuts. You’re going to love it.’ “
Larry Robinson was part of the Canadiens’ 1986 Stanley Cup team. He was also an assistant coach under Jacques Lemaire when Lemieux won his second of four Stanley Cups with the New Jersey Devils in 1995.
“Basically, I’m in complete shock,” Robinson said Thursday night.
Robinson carried the torch into the Bell Centre ahead of Game 6 of the Canadiens’ second-round playoff series against the Buffalo Sabres. He watched Lemieux carry the torch on Monday night on TV with his wife at their home in Florida.
“We both commented how good he looked,” Robinson said. “He looked great. But who knows what’s going on inside the head, right? I’m just sad that he didn’t reach out to one of us to talk to us and let us know that something isn’t right because I know he has my number.”
Nilan said there were no signs that Lemieux was struggling when he spoke with him Monday night and posed for a photo with him and their former teammate Sergio Momesso.
“You always hear about people who take their own lives, that it’s a permanent solution to a temporary problem,” Nilan said. “But we don’t know that … we don’t know what people are going through. We don’t know how temporary it is. It could be every day. That’s the thing … a lot of people suffer in silence and try to protect what’s going on with them and not let people know. You just don’t know. Check on your teammates. It’s not just teammates … it’s friends, it’s family, it’s co-workers. I think we need to do more of that. It’s just so friggin’ sad and hard to understand. This is one that’s hard for me to fathom and understand.
“Just getting that time with him,” Nilan added. “You never know when you’re going to see someone for the last time.”
Help is available if you or someone you know is struggling. Call Info-Social at 811, Option 2. If you are having thoughts of suicide, call 911 or Suicide Action Montreal at 1-866-277-3553.